So that whole Swiss army knife thing...

[brinshannara]

You may be asking yourself what the hell that whole Swiss army knife / gender / orientation poll was about. I was on the phone with a friend last night and she made mention she'd bought someone a Swiss army knife. And I was like, what, why? She replied that Swiss army knives were "right up there with toaster ovens" and that all lesbians have them.

"No way!" I exclaimed, and then paused. "Wait, I have two."

"See!" replied my friend.

So I did up the poll. Looking at the results, we have:

6 queer women who have at least one knife, or have owned one in the past.
3 straight women who have never owned one.
1 queer person who used to have one.
1 man who doesn't have one.
1 straight woman who owns more than one.
1 gay woman who doesn't own one.

Therefore, the hypothesis that all lesbians (expanded to include all queer women) have a Swiss army knife (expanded to include owned over their lifetime) seems fairly correct. And amesville? Go get a Swiss army knife to prove me right, 'kay? ;) (Edited to change literaryradical to amesville. Whoops.)

And, the amusing conversation portion of this subject, from an AIM chat last night:

brinshannara: the theory is that all lesbians have swiss army knives.
worshipper: You have a brilliant career ahead of you in a think tank.

Comments

[mtgat]

*blink* Can I put up a link to this and tell people to spread it around, or would you prefer not?

Re:

[brinshannara]

Sure, spread it around. :)

http://www.livejournal.com/users/brinshannara/219391.html for the poll, http://www.livejournal.com/users/brinshannara/219880.html for this post. :)

Nifty little correlation there, no? :)

[trexphile.livejournal.com]

Does it have to be a Swiss army knife specifically? How 'bout a plain old pocketknife? I've carried one of those on my keychain forever and used it many times. Well, till I started flying again and couldn't get through security with it anymore.

Re:

[brinshannara]

You're straight, so you don't count anyways. ;) But I guess Swiss army knife can be interpreted however the user likes.

My friend actually used the term "Swiss army knife", and that's what she bought her friend. Personally, mine are both actual Swiss army knives, with a bunch of cool tools in them, both actually from a retailer in Switzerland, so I don't think of a pocket knife or a knock-off of the Swiss army knives.

Hm. I'm a pocket knife snob, I guess. ;)

pah.

[carta.livejournal.com]

I will buy a Swiss Army Knife the day that Ricky Martin comes out of the closet. (Which will also be the day I own a toaster oven.)

:P

I do, however, own a Swiss Army watch...

Re: pah.

[brinshannara]

Don't make me BUY you one. ;)

As to Ricky, yes, he needs to come out. Now.

But Swiss army knives are HANDY!

[poisoninjest.livejournal.com]

I'm very amused by the fact that I classify myself as "not quite straight" and own a miniature Swiss Army knife. *g*

Re:

[brinshannara]

<laughs> That's great! :D It's very amusing to me, too!

[shiningmoon.livejournal.com]

I do not own a Swiss Army Knife. I do however have a 256 MB thumb drive. ;)